What’s Been Goin’ On . . .

Photo by stuff.co.nz–This photo resource is used for education, research or criticism purposes only.

Commentary:

For the longest time most members of the other gender have made their thoughts known quite clearly that men are not good at multi-tasking. Of course I disagree with that statement. On the contrary men can be good at it when we put our minds to it. However, we don’t much see the need to multi task to the extent that our counter parts do. Are women good at multi tasking? I really don’t know. If you ask most females they will undoubtedly say they ALL are. I could agree that SOME are but only at certain things.

Look at the picture above and then ask the question again: ” Can men multi task and do it well?–YES! We can. Truth be known we often choose not to because we don’t understand the need to. We also understand that it really is not ‘good’ for people to continuously take on more than one job at a time.

Men are more likely to  take on a job–one job at a time thank you–see that job through to it’s end–step back and survey the finished product–correct any small imperfections and then move on to the next job or challenge. It is more satisfying for us this way. Most of the time we know that it is done as well as it could be given all the possibilities. We also know that the human mind, this includes the lassies as well, can only process one thought at a time. To try to do otherwise can promote stress and panic attacks. Why would anyone knowingly do this to themselves? This is not true, of course, for the autonomic responses such as breathing, blinking and heart beats. We don’t have to think about doing these.

Multitasking simply is not something that we see as beneficial so why do it?–All the best, Jim

Comments are welcome–jim.lifechoice@gmail.com  OR  jimcloughley.com

Please pass this long to family and friends–with thanks.

Truth Talkin’ Thursday:

Jane and I are back in the saddle this week discussing the value or downside of making New Years Eve resolutions. If you have any thoughts about them we’d love to hear them. To hear more about how we see things go to my web page at jimcloughley.com and click on the tab marked: Truth Talkin’ Thursday. The latest episode will pop up for ya.

Forward Thinking Program:

After taking some time off to re-energize I’m back to the work of creating and producing a new comprehensive educational model that will truly and totally revolutionize how we educate our children and how this approach will enable them to, not only compete successfully but to be leaders in the new global economies that will soon mark our way of life. We, as parents and guardians of the next generation of learners, must do all we can to prepare our children so they can utilize the best opportunities for success. More to come regarding this exciting news and what you can do to become more involved in the process.

Video For The Week:

This clip might pick up the old heart rate a bit. When Tom C was king–Enjoy

My Suggestion . . . Don’t Do It

Most of us do this. Most of us are not very successful at doing this–about 90 %, in fact, don’t do this well at all. We don’t make good on the resolutions we make on or about New Years. My strong recommendation is—DON’T DO IT. Why?  I believe that resolutions are very unhealthy-certainly mentally and emotionally and even physically. Not in and of themselves but what they have come to represent among us. How many people do you know who have actually been successful at following through with a realistic New Years Eve resolution? Not that many. For me, I don’t think I know anyone.

Before I get to that lets consider the top 10 list of New Years resolutions. This should help understand a good part of the problem and why people are not more successful realizing their goals.

10. Drinking less

9.   Volunteering more

8.   Be less stressed

7.    Travel to new places

6.    Spend more time with the family

5.    Get out of debt and save more money

4.    Eat/diet in a more healthy manner

3.    Learn something new

2.    Quit smoking

1.    The number one resolution across the board is: Lose weight and get fit.

The 5 reasons why people aren’t more successful at realizing their resolutions are these:

1. We haven’t decided whether our resolution is a ‘want’ or a ‘need’ for us. We will usually do much better making changes in our lives when the things that we are considering are things that we want and not things that we need. For example one of the items on the list is to stop smoking. We have made ourselves or have been led to believe that quitting is just about the most difficult behaviour in the world to do. Really it isn’t. Those who find it difficult are those who don’t WANT to quit but rather NEED to quit. Think about it. We really don’t find it hard to make changes when we really want to do something that we feel will benefit us. As long as we see it as a benefit and the quality of our lives is enhanced in some way we will continue to enjoy the change(s) we have made.  If you look at the list now and go item by item isn’t that the truth for most of those that are listed. It’s true that anybody can quit smoking or cut way down by using the NRT-nicotine replacement therapy or any other means. However, the goal is to remain ‘quit’. It is to enjoy long lasting change and not short term abstinence. How many do we know that begin, after a while, to sneak out and have a puff or two and then just one cigarette believing that they can, now, manage their smoking problem successfully because they have been ‘clean’ now for a month or so? “I know how to do this now”, they say. This is the song that most sing as they try to figure out when the ‘wheels’ fell off.

2. Most who recite a New Years Eve resolution don’t have a plan of any kind in mind to help support their efforts.

3. Often many set the challenge so high that the goal becomes unreasonable or not ‘doable’. They are either unprepared, not knowledgeable enough or haven’t developed the skill set necessary to support their efforts. It is easier to revise the goal upward than to reduce the goal downward.

4.  Many don’t have the ‘staying’ power to see the job done to the end. They give up part way through the change process. (consider #2)

5.   No dedication to the idea of change. If your resolution is important enough to be on your list then it needs to be important enough to start working on it right away and not delay it to some arbitrary date on the calendar. Postponing it is the same as given ourselves permission to have a ‘last hurrah.’ Its permission to go nuts and not feel guilty about doing it.

 

The 5 wisdoms that lead us to change, growth and Success

1.   Be informed. Before you attempt to change something about yourself be sure to be informed. Investigate, learn and decide who you want to be–then begin to live it.

2.   Be smart. Don’t just jump in and hope that everything will turn out OK. Develop a plan that allows for change and develop a support system that you can depend on.

3.   Act directly. Commit to your idea. You have to be all in and prepared to do what needs to be done. Sometimes that comes with pain but no growth happens without discomfort of some kind. That’s the price we pay sometimes for leaving our comfort zones. Do not be deterred by those who do not support your effort to change and to grow. Many will not be happy to see you change so lessen the time you spend with those folks.

4.   Never decide in anger. Good decisions usually come from choosing what you believe to be in your best interests. Seldom do they come from anger.

5.   Follow your head and not your heart. Your head does the thinking and your heart does the feeling. We often get these mixed up.

 

When defeat is our only constant we become demoralized and a feeling of negativity begins to settle in. We start to think that we will never get to where we want to be and after that we decide that we will never get there because we are not worthy and we don’t deserve what it is we pursue. Let’s not give defeat an opportunity to become a constant. Spur of the moment resolutions often become the companion of sadness and depression. That’s why I believe that resolutions are dangerous. Don’t do it.  Be wise. Be successful.  

Anyways, that’s how I see it, All the best–Jim

Any comments pro/con will be respected-please contact me at: jim.lifechoice@gmail.com   OR go to my web page-contact page at jimcloughley.com  and please, in any event, pass this along to your friends.

Year End List Of My Favourite And Most Helpful Lists

Well it’s always a matter of time before things get to this point and so here we are. People are running around feverishly feeling stressed to the max-fearful of forgetting things or not having included things and so they resort to making a list. They make lists for everything and now all they have to do is remember where they put the master list so they know where all the other lists are.

I fit in there somewhere but my lists tend to be somewhat different. Since I have all but sworn off buying gifts for people at Christmas time because most have no use for what they receive anyway (What is re-gifting?) I escape the ‘rush’ at this time of the year with little guilt attached. Of course our grand daughter is the exception–she makes out quite nicely.

So I decided to create what I considered to be the list of lists which had the greatest impact on, not only my life as a professional but as a regular citizen as well. I also considered all the people that I had contact with over the year who benefited as well.

5 Very Important Potentially Life Altering Questions

–Under what circumstances is it OK to take someone elses life? Is it OK under ANY circumstances?

–Do governments think and speak for us or do they represent us to other domestic and world constituents?  (Do they work for us or do we work for them?)

–Should the wants of a few override the needs of the many?

–What is the difference between diversity and political correctness?

–Should we, as citizens, make potential life altering decisions by referendum or do we trust the government of the day to do the right thing?

8 Realities That Make Us Go Hmmmmm?

–The more we embrace multiculturalism the less we enjoy our own traditions, culture and identity.

–The more money we earn–the harder we work–the less we can afford.

–The more rights others claim the less freedom we seem to have.

–The older we get the faster time goes by.

–The more we depend upon technology the less safe and secure we become.

–The longer we endure political correctness the closer we move toward our own demise.

–The more entitled we become the more others are restricted.

–The more we leave it for others to do for us, the more they will do it to us.

10 Things Men Need To Understand About Women-A Women’s Perspective

–Please don’t talk over me or interrupt me especially in public. I may have something to say that is important to me too.

–I need you to listen to me NOT fix my problems for me.

–Throwing things around in anger does not make you a man or gain my respect. A real man is able to control his emotions without threatening people.

–Don’t criticize me or embarrass me in from of others.

–Be respectful and mannerly especially in public places.

–Don’t stare at or ogle other women when we are out together.

NEVER threaten or push yourself on me.

–Take responsibility for who you are and what you do. Don’t blame it on others.

–Allow me to be who I am–Me

–Have a purpose in life and pursue it.

10 Things That Women Need To Understand About Men-A Man’s Perspective

–If you don’t want to hear the answer then please don’t ask the question.

–There is little more fragile than the male ego. Please be careful how you fight and what you say.

–If we walk away it is because we need time to think and cool off and not because we don’t care. Leave us alone and we will get back to you.

–Say what you mean and mean what you say. Let’s keep it simple.

–When making a point, don’t make it about winning. If someone wins that means someone loses. State you piece, and I’ll do the same. Now we have both heard it so let’s move on.

–Don’t tell me how to think and feel and I won’t do that to you. And let’s leave the ‘shoulds’ out of the conversation.

–We think of hair rollers, fuzzy slippers, old ragged ‘comfy’ house coats and ‘knee-highs’ as instant and natural birth control devices.

–At the very least try treating us as well as you treat your friends.

–If you want the seat down then put it up when you are done.

–Understand that everything has the potential of being a competition.

7 Things That I Ponder As I Get Older (Origin Unknown)

–I started out with nothing, and I still have most of it.

–It’s hard to make a comeback when you haven’t been anywhere.

–These days , I spend a great deal of time, it seems, thinking about the “here after.” I go somewhere to get something, and then wonder what I’m “here after”.

–Some days you’re top dog and some days you’re the hydrant.

–It is still a great deal better to be seen than viewed.

–The world only beats a path to your door when you’re in the bathroom.

–It’s a whole lot easier getting older than it was getting wiser.

Anyways, that’s how I see it. All the best and enjoy a very MERRY CHRISTMAS 

That’s it for another year. I hope to be back again next year with another scintillating collection of thoughts, recollections and observations. If you have a desire to contact me you can do so at: jim.lifechoice@gmail.com   OR  go to my web site at jimcloughley.com

 

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